Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Carol is back.

Hello and greetings to all. This is Carol, finally back on line after being a snowbird for several months. We were told that we had missed some serious winter weather while cavorting naked in the Florida sun.
When we first got back I was tired and a bit bummed between the gray skiies, the coldness and dampness (especially in contrast to sun and warmth we had been enjoying), Dad's being hospitalized, my doctor being concerned about my blood pressure being elevated, telling me I have to give up soda and cut down on salt (ekkk!), she also put me on Lisinopril-10mg daily (ase inhibitor). I have known that I wanted to lose weight anyhow. Now I know I need to. The doc's order will help give me the kick in the pants that I need. It is so hard to balance mood and when it messes with physical health it gets to be an even more delicate balance. I was soooo worried about going over the mania line to psychosis last summer that I did not care what else went to hell. Now my mood is stable, I have to deal with the weight I packed on staying out of the psych ward. So goes the life of a person with bipolar disorder!
After three years of legal work, my SSI finally came through. Disability turned me down saying I was not insured when disabled (hospitalization in 2003). Never mind that my moods have been unstable all my life! Anyway, I have some income of my own now after years of depending totally on Barb, who is very generous with hers. Two days of warmer weather and some sun have perked up my mood and motivated me to get out more. (I was a worthless couch potato for a good week after our return!!!) We have crocus, grape hyacinths, tulips and dafodils peeking out of the ground all over our yard (I went crazy with bulbs last fall) and the iris bed at Kelly clinic felt some attention from me the past two days when were at the clinic for appointments. I also have a mural to paint up in Rochester around Morley Schloss's swimming pool. We are using the lump sum from SSI to splurge on a much needed new bed (soft sided waterbed) and my personal splurge was to get myself an ipod, so now I can groove to my tunes everywhere. I lent Dad my walkman at the hospital when he was in pain and could not get comfortable. I put on a Mozart Effect healing CD and put it on his ears. It was nice to watch his eyes close and his face relax. We are looking forward to a visit to see the Alfred Clarkes very soon. We missed seeing Doug or Jeanette or Ian when we stopped to see Dad. Doug et al were in Rochester seeing Leo Kottke that night. I was envious and still have not heard a report about the concert. It would be silly to ask if you enjoyed it!
Can y'all come visit for Memorial Day again? I enjoyed having y'all here last year.
In addition, we got a nice selection of fireworks in TN that we need help viewing, could be either Memorial Day weekend or whenever we choose. Doug, can you help set them off safely for us?
Well, I will close for now with much love and hugs all 'round. -Carol

1 comment:

Sherman Clarke said...

He's back from Kansas City, and it was wonderful. The meetings were good and the weather was splendiferous: mostly warm but sometimes thunder-and-lightning and light flash flooding. Talk about bipolar!! I was staying at a small guesthouse about 20-minutes walk from the conference hotel which meant that I got to see much more of the city than the conference-bound. I had a back porch on my room and enjoyed sitting out there naked, smoking. Our private pleasures, now shared. I only sat out there naked after dark. You don't have to tell Dad that part.
Also did a lot of reading. I had just finished Three farmers on their way to a dance by Richard Powers (bookclub) before leaving. Then read Alternatives to sex by Stephen McCauley. And then finished An unquiet mind by Kay Redfield Jamison on the flight homw. Jamison's book is about manic-depressive illness: she has it and is a psychological researcher/teacher who studies it. It is very compelling and I suggest reading it if you haven't already. Gotta pee, I'll be back.